Can you hear the sound of hysteria? If not can you see it?

If you could, would you hear a sound quite unlike any you've ever heard coming from me? One that would make a Deaf man hear and a normal one lose his hearing. If you could, would you see the kaleidoscope of colours spinning wildly wildly out of control till it all fades out and all that's left would be a deep velvet darkness, one you can't penetrate, one you won't be able to find your way out of. My darkness. that which is within. That darkness which I can't find my own way out of. My own darkness.

It's all consuming. consuming me.

up Ahead of me there is a way out. A way that would bring me to the place I've always wanted to go to. But. Around me, there are all these distractions. and each time I get distracted I fall a little deeper in, a little farther from where I want to be. and each time I cry, my vision blurs and I fall a whole way back. and it's tiring to climb up the same way. I realize that some of the tracks have been made more than once or twice. I've travelled there more than once or twice. And I realize I'm tired. of seeing the same old things. things that were not worth seeing in the first place and only gets more draining each subsequent time.

Maybe it's me. Maybe it's simply because I'm not worth it.

*dreams*
1 . TELL her she is beautiful (not hot, fine, or sexy)~
2 . HOLD her hand at any moment,even if its jus for a sec.~
3 . Leave her MSGs.~
4. CALL her when you MISS her (which should be quite often and don't bother about whether she's busy. She'll never be too busy for you. and if she is she'll tell you. after you call.).~
5 . When she is upset/scared,hold her TIGHT & tell her how much she MEANS to u.~
6 . Recognize e SMALL things,that mean e most.~
7 . SING to her no matter how horrible ur voice is.~
8 . WRITE her notes.(she loves them)~
9 . INTRODUCE her to family and friends,as ur girlfriend.~
10 . PLAY with her hair.~
11 . Pick her up,TICKLE her.~
12 . Sit in e park & JUST TALK to her.~
13 . Tell her funny/stupid JOKES.~
14 . Let her fall asleep in ur ARMS.~
15. TOUCH her cheeks as she sleep.~
16 . If she's mad at u,KISS her.~
17 . Bring her FLOWERS.
18 . Treat her e SAME ard ur FRIENDS asu do when ur ALONE.~
19 . LOOK her in the eyes & SMILE.~
20 . Let her take as many PICTURES of u as she wants.~
21 . If you are in LOVE with her,TELL HER.~ 11:27:00 PM